By: Allison McCarthy, MBA | amccarthy@barlowmccarthy.com
Are you a perfectionist? Consider it a virtue? Or does it lead to self-criticism or pen you into a safe, risk-free zone to avoid failure?
Perfectionism often goes hand in hand with imposter syndrome – the belief that you are not good enough for the role you’re in, a guilty secret you hope will never be revealed. So, what would be a better way to measure progress if perfection is a standard no one can ever meet?
In the book Hidden Potential, Adam Grant emphasizes the need to learn how to work with imperfection. Grant argues that embracing imperfection is not a sign of weakness but a path to resilience and growth. It’s about being willing to make and learn from mistakes, nurturing self-compassion, and striving for personal excellence rather than unattainable perfection.
Grant explains that perfectionists tend to focus excessively on insignificant details, shy away from unfamiliar challenges, and harshly criticize themselves for mistakes. This is often why career advancements are delayed, as individuals stay in the comfort zone of familiar tasks rather than stretching into more significant activities and efforts that will have a greater impact.
A Success Formula?
Perfectionists may have been straight-A students all through school by figuring out what the teacher wanted but failing to develop critical thinking skills. In junior high school, I mastered memorization, which helped me perform well on tests and get good grades. But it stunted my growth in critical skills like confronting challenges, identifying trends, and generating ideas to be tested.
My “success formula” finally caught up with me when I was in my MBA program. I faced a good 10-year journey of learning how to learn all over again. In my work today, I share those lessons with others, teaching them to think more strategically and step out of the role of order-takers.
Grant highlights the Japanese concept of wabi sabi, which celebrates the beauty found in imperfection. He explains that wabi sabi “is not about creating intentional imperfection. It’s about accepting that flaws are inevitable – and recognizing that they don’t stop something from being sublime.”
How do you strive for excellence without succumbing to perfectionism? Here are some keys: Set high but achievable standards that foster growth. Learn from setbacks rather than beating yourself up when they inevitably occur.
This gives you the space to experiment and take reasonable risks. Growth is measured by charting past achievements, acknowledging the journey, and celebrating progress.
Coaching can help rising leaders break through their perfectionist tendencies and find a path of personal growth and accountability. A coach helps the rising leader by:
- Identifying and calling out the areas of improvement desired.
- Guiding the leader on how they will make those improvements and what it will look like when they do.
- Asking the rising leader to identify ways to measure their improvements through self-reflection or by gathering feedback from others.
- Regularly scheduling touchpoint discussions to explore progress, identifying situations in which the rising leader falls back, and continuously offering insights on how to move beyond them.
Someone once suggested to me that I regularly say to myself: “It’s not perfect, but it’s good enough.” Embracing a wabi sabi mindset means recognizing which ideals are worth pursuing and which ones are not; where to put the effort and where to let go; and which imperfections are acceptable and which ones are not.